Release


Ready for Canada. Gift from my hairdressing team

I'm counting the last hours until leaving.I'm sitting at the airport and my emotional carousel is driving much faster.
My view of life is changing a lot. I'm not a person who is judging that much but I did and in the last days I tried to change my way of thinking. And do you know how wonderful life could be if you are more open minded and percieving more consciously your surroundings?
If you try to see in each bad situaion the good in it makes everything more easy. Well it is not easy to think always positive and I can't do it every time even if I want to. But to try make it less complicated.
I got feelings full of pain, joy, anger, despair and hope. To handle with this is hard but I'm finding a way for me to work with that.
Well we had a car accident last week and my first thought was "Oh my god we broke down the car of someone else" and the second thought was "Is everybody ok?". I'm a bit shocked that my first intention was just tangible. Much more important are our lifes. My boyfriend and my dog are in good health, they are alive and nobody else was injured. Okay, car accidents are happening all the time. And so many people worry about flying. How many people you know which had an accident with a plane and how many with a car? Don't be afraid of it, a plane is more safety.
It is daunting if you drive in the rush hour and eye your surroundings where you can see hundreds of cars and it needs just a second of distraction which can change your life.
This experience made me more thankful for my life and for all this beautiful humans around me.

Will miss this beautiful view out of my window!

We had a lot to do in our apartment until today and you had a lot time to think about what really matters to you. In my opinion we mostly are collecting our life but don't live it. I started to try hard to minimalize my stuff. My goal was to use a backpack for Canada and not a suitcase. And I got it. I'm sure that there still will be too much stuff but I'm on a good way. Still shocked how much rubbish we are collecting and think we really need it until we start to think about it. While cleaning it felt like sorting out my brain. It's like you save too many information and memories over the years. Your apartment or house shows you the mirror. Why do we need all of them? Not every single detail has to be saved. That is too much for your brain, not wondering that so many people got a burn out or other mental illness. Why do we holding on our past? It is not important for your future. You choose your life every single day in the present. So, sort out your past. I definitely will try to do it from now on regularly. We have to release to let happen something new.

This necklace gave me an inspiring travel mate in Australia in 2012. Now I really follow this message.

Well, I had to release so much the last couple of days.
I said goodbye to so many wonderful people and to my lovely family. I can't realize it but it was very emotional. Everything felt so truly right and I think I really release my past and now I'm open for something new. But it is hurting as well. Didn't cry that much before Australia. It felt totally different this time. I'm not running away like last time, I made the decision to start living the life I imagine.
And I will take my people into the present as well with lots of love although I'm not living around the corner the next time. I will carry them in my heart.
I love you. 
So, now I will go on to the plane and I'm f*cking nervous. 
See you soon Vancouver. 

The sky fascinates me so much in the last weeks.

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